Friday, September 17, 2010

#30daysofme - #7

Day 7 is a picture of someone/something that has the biggest impact on me, which would be my RnY (2nd picture) without question:
I just want to preface this by saying I am far from a model patient, but please refrain from any judgements - if you want to do that, go have the surgery & then we'll talk. I'm just telling it like it is.

Take yesterday, for example. I woke up and immediately hopped on the scale to see what I weighed. Then comes the vitamins and medication - I take one chewable multivitamin with 18mg of iron now and one right before bed - in total I get 36mg of iron a day. In the mornings I also take 40mg of omeprazole and a B12 with at least 500 mcg.

I go out for a venti skinny cinnamon dolce latte, 160 calories & 15 grams of protein. I add 6 splenda's. I come home, do a load of laundry and a load of dishes, and take my calcium - 2 tablespoons of liquid calcium citrate with vitamin D. I have to make sure it's citrate and not carbonate since I don't absorb the latter, and I take a total of 1,000 mcg (of calcium) and 400IU (of vitamin D) per day.

I head out again to pick Keith up from work, stopping on the way to grab another latte. Then we deviate from the norm; we go to the mall to grab a few things, like a new gym bag for me (soooo pretty). We order two snack wraps (chicken caesar) from Tim Hortons. I take 2 bites of the actual bread itself and immediately feel pain in my upper chest. I then proceed to pick out the lettuce and chicken and leave the bread for Keith - but not before struggling to breathe in Sears and having to run back to the bathroom in case it comes up. It doesn't, but it's just another lesson learned; my body absolutely cannot handle bread products. I don't know the actual caloric value of the wrap since I didn't eat the bread, but it does have 13 grams of protein.

For sake of brevity - and the night really doesn't bear repeating - we order KFC for dinner. It's the first time since before surgery; the difference between couldn't have been more vast. Before I could have easily put away five or six pieces of chicken, half an extra large fry (both doused in gravy) and healthy dollop of potato salad, all washed down by a Diet Pepsi.

Tonight? I barely managed 1 and a half pieces of breast. I didn't eat the skin. I had a forkful of fries, with a little gravy, and I didn't even touch the salads, or the drink. And then I lay down on the couch and felt like complete and utter shit for close to an hour after, all the while wondering why I even bother eating at all. Total protein was 43.5 grams though, which is huge.

I track my food consumption daily on Total calories for the day was 740 - and this was a really high day. (I included the entire wrap but not the fries, to balance it out).

But I don't just deal with calories. I also track other things - for example, today's totals were: 87 grams of protein, 67 grams of carbs, 13 grams of fat, 44 grams of sugar (really high, from the milk in the lattes), and 3 grams of fiber.

I never used to do any of this. I just used to eat. I didn't avoid carbs, or sugar, or consume protein first. I just ate. It impacts every single waking second of my day because I am constantly thinking about the logistics of eating. It's exhausting.

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