Saturday, December 22, 2007

07 in 40 questions

01. What did you do in 2007 that you'd never done before? Date someone younger than I.
02. Did you keep your new years' resolutions, and will you make more for next year? I don't make resolutions, because I end up breaking them. So I save myself the guilt and just don't make any.
03. Did someone close to you give birth or father a child? Not particularly close to me now, but in the past they were. There are quite a few of them who have had kids or are expecting quite soon. Actually, I think I'm pretty close to the only girl I know in my little social circle who doesn't have a kid or isn't pregnant....and they're keeping them. It's like a pandemic. That I just don't understand.
04. Did anyone close to you die? Yes, my Grandma died last January. And Tammy. (RIP)
05. What countries did you visit? England.
06. What would you like to have in 2008 that you lacked in 2007? Someone all to myself. Not going to happen though
07. What date from 2007 will remain etched upon your memory, and why? The day I first actually met Kevin in the flesh.....the day he ended it.......the day(s) I got both my animals. The day I re-met K.02. If it weren't for blogging about it, I wouldn't remember the actual date at all. haha.
08. What was your biggest achievement(s) of the year? I actually stopped drinking so much. And I actually tried in school (fat lot of good that did me).
09. What was your biggest failure(s)? Don't really want to say on here.
10. Did you suffer illness or injury? Just a couple of nasty colds. And if by illness you're including mental ones, then it's undiagnosed as of yet. Same with my insomnia. Oh and I got diagnosed with ADHD (inattentive type). Yeah, me. ADHD. Whodathunkit? I mean, really, come on - quiet little bookwormish me having ADHD? oooh look, shiny thing.....*watches mesmerized*.
11. What was the best thing you bought? My octopus lamp. Pretty much the entire apartments worth of furniture.
12. Whose behaviour merited celebration? The Pegster. Skittle. K.02
13. Whose behaviour made you appalled and depressed? Um, no comment at this time is available. Kevin would be a safe bet though.
14. Where did most of your money go? Rent. Too much was spent on drugs, yet again. >_<
15. What did you get really, really, really excited about? Can't remember? Probably going to London.
16. What song(s) will always remind you of 2007? Waaay too many. Anything by Michael Bublé, any country, Fall Out Boy and Tori Amos.
17. Compared to this time last year, are you:
i. happier or sadder? About the same, sad.
ii. thinner or fatter? About the same, fat.
iii. richer or poorer? Much poorer.
18. What do you wish you'd done more of? First half, gone out more to friend's places. Second, spent more time going to school.
19. What do you wish you'd done less of? Wasting all that time and energy on Kevin. Spending so much time on Facebook! lol.
20. How will you be spending Christmas? With the rest of my immediate family at a yoga retreat centre in Montreal. First time since I've moved out I'm spending it somewhere else than by myself, lazing around the house and sleeping. Weird.
21. How will you be spending New Year's? Travelling back from Montreal, sleeping? Maybe with Skittles, chilling at home.
22. Did you fall in love in 2007? Yeah. Twice? (my god, I'm a love-slut).
23. How many one-night stands? Eh, tis none of your damn business.
24. What was your favourite TV program(s)? Grey's, ER, Project Runway Canada/US, Friends....there's more but I can't be assed listing all of them.
25. Do you hate anyone now that you didn't hate this time last year? No.
26. What was the best book you read? Crap. Way too many. Getting Rid of Matthew, We Need To Talk About Kevin, Smashed: Story of a Drunken Girlhood, Good In Bed, The Phantom Tollbooth, The Twilight Triology and of course, my all time favourite - Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy.
27. What was your greatest musical discovery? Michael Bublé! Fall Out Boy, Tori Amos, Josh Groban, NIN.... um...can't remember the rest, it's been so long since I listened to any of my own music :( However, if it weren't for KB, I wouldn't have half of those! Thanks darling.
28. What did you want and get? Love. It was just with a different person than I originally expected.
29. What did you want and not get? A pony. I'm still upset about that. Hmmph.
30. Favorite film of this year? Favorite film that was released this year? There were so many movies I wanted to see that came out this year and didn't. Boo. Um...favourite movie of this year....Love & Basketball, Stranger Than Fiction, Pride & Prejudice, and Thank you for Smoking. I could watch those movies over and over. Love & Basketball never fails to make me tear up at the ending. It's so sweet.
31. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you? I was 20. I had a few drinks and spent the night chatting online to my sortof boyfriend at the time.
32. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying? More flowers! hee.
33. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2007? Personal fashion concept? There's such a thing? Lots of raggedy. Lots of black. Lots of v-neck shirts and sweaters. Lots of wearing the same thing over and over and over and over....
34. What kept you sane? The Pegster. Skittles. KB. Music.
35. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most? Eh. Jon Stewart.
36. What political issue stirred you the most? It's not a new issue (nor is it even that policital) but it continues to 'stir' me - the fact that people are discriminated against for their sexual orientation by not being allowed to give blood. F*** you, Canadian Blood Services! Other than that....our stupid Mayor shutting down the SITE Van (they distributed safe inhalent kits)...and also, our INCREDIBLE DOOFUS of a Mayor deciding to continue on as Mayor AFTER he had been charged of bribery and something else under the Criminal Code in order to get his position.
37. Who do you miss? Kevin, but I'm over that now. Kinda :S
38. Who was the best new person you met? On the internet or in person? hahahaha. Internet; KB, in person, the roommie.
39. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2007: Any mark is better than zero so just start working on it already.
40. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year:
"You make me so hot
Make me wanna drop
You're so ridiculous
I can barely stop
I can hardly breathe
You make me wanna scream
You're so fabulous
You're so good to me Baby Baby" hahahahaha.

Thursday, December 20, 2007

Tribute to my Daddy

So yesterday was my Daddy's 59th birthday. (Yep, I have old parents. That's what happens when you get adopted 12 years after the birth of their first son, and 2 years after his death).
Being adopted I always kind of struggled with the "you-aren't-my-real-parents" syndrome, especially when I was younger. But from the get-go, my dad was utterly, totally, completely my daddy (so was my mom, but we'll get to her on another occasion). I can't even begin to comprehend what it was like to deal with a newborn baby night after night after 9 years of not having one, and especially at the age he was - 39. And with the arrival of my half-sister two and a half years later, he did it all again, only this time even older.
My dad grew up in the Prairies and met my mother while dealing blackjack at a casino. They then went to live in the UK for three years in the late 60's-early 70's, getting married at one point. They spent the next number of years backpacking around Europe and the Middle East - I remember one story he told me of walking down the cobblestone streets of Prague, wearing cowboy boots; "I was walking down the street, sounding like the devil while looking like Jesus."

They came back to Canada and settled in a small farming community about 3 hours northeast of Edmonton on a small parcel of land. For the first bit, they lived in a shack while my amazing father built a log house from scratch for his growing family - Jed was born in 1975 and Jesse followed 3 years later. He turned that skill into a profitable business, along with custom cabinetry and other various woodworking and stone-masonry projects.

In 1984, his oldest, Jed, was diagnosed with leukemia. In 1985, Jed passed away. I know I won't ever even begin to comprehend the pain and loss felt after the death of a child, but I thank my lucky stars every day that my dad was open to welcoming more children into his heart and life. I arrived 2 years later (incidentally, my birthday is 2 days before Jed's) by private adoption. And my sister arrived 2 and a half years later - my birthmother had gotten pregnant again and my parents felt that siblings should be raised together, so when my BM asked them to adopt again, they said yes.


When I was little, Daddy used to "Roar" in my face like a lion. And I used to get scared and state quite firmly "GO 'WAY LION!!!" Except, in toddler-speak, it came out more like "GO 'WAY LY-ION!!!" To this day it's our little father-daughter inside joke and one of my favourite family stories.

For the first 6 years of my life, I lived in the log cabin my dad had lovingly built. Dad had taken a job with the government by then, so the following years were spent moving steadily west, until we settled in Nanaimo, on Vancouver Island, when I was 8. We lived in an amazingly beautiful house, 10 minutes away from the beach and set on .08 of an acre, with a highly developed backyard with many mature fruit trees and the like. My dad put his talent and skill to work again and built beautiful stone steps and border underneath the grape arbour. I used to daydream as a little girl that I would get married standing on those stone steps.
Growing up, my dad did the laundry. and the nightly cooking. and the cleaning. and everything else that, are, traditionally considered the "woman's role". I'm afraid that he spoiled me for any future boyfriends - any guy who can't pull his weight in household chores doesn't get to date this girl.

When I was 13, my parents separated and my mom moved us out East to be closer to her family. My sister changed her last name to my mother's maiden name, but I kept mine. In fact, I'm thinking of passing it down to my children somehow. Dad became a 'summer-father' and I treasured those times beyond measure. I missed the scenery and lifestyle of the West Coast so much, but more importantly, I missed my Dad. Completely. Totally. Achingly.

I admit freely that I'm a complete Daddy's girl. We just "get" each other in a way no one else in the family does. We share the same sense of twisted, jaded humour. He's been my sounding board on important life questions when I couldn't (can't) go to my mom. When I moved out at age 17 and didn't speak to my mother for months, he was always there, just a phone call away, for me to pour my heart out to about anything. Sometimes I called daily. He even made it out East to visit me before my mom did. He is still the only man in my life to buy me flowers, the only man whom I know loves me unconditionally, and the only one who has captured my heart so completely.


So here's to you, Dad. I love you. So much. Thank you for allowing me to become part of your family. I couldn't have asked for a better father. Happy 59th Birthday.

Wednesday, December 19, 2007

Another to-do list:

Pick up after Molly. Swiffer floor wherever I just picked up. 1 load of dishes. Swiffer old bedroom floor until you see your reflection in it. Take down all knicknacks from bedroom windowsill & wipe clean (by lordy, it's dirty under there). Windex windows belonging to previously mentioned sill. Stop compulsively reading this blog. Swiffer living room. Windex balcony doors. Set up newly acquired dining table and pretty it up. Clean off coffee table. Install newly acquired blacklight over bar area (not as simple as it sounds - I have to find the screwdriver first). Rearrange branches on newly acquired 2' tall silver fiber optic tree on newly acquired two tiered desk next to TV. Set up all electronics (ps2, dvd player) on aforementioned desk. Put litter box underneath desk. Figure out what to do with newly acquired patio furniture, now in a corner of the living room. Wipe down outside of fridge. Think of scrubbing out the inside of it. Take out garbage. Windex bathroom mirror. Stop listening to Avril Lavigne's "Hot" on repeat. Put up posters on walls not belonging to bedroom. Think longingly of Skittles' newly acquired absoutely GIGANTIC Japanese inspired fan, and how good it would look on either wall of living room. Take frequent smoke breaks. Take frequent MSN breaks. Sweep, then swiffer, bathroom floor. Scrub toliet. Scrub bathtub. Put newly acquired computer chair in old bedroom. Find every toy spring and mouse belonging to the animals and put in basket next to balcony doors. Stop listening to Avril Lavigne's "Hot" on repeat already. Do NOT dip into newly acquired alcohol supply. Debate seriously whether or not to put 36 to 48 beer bottles in a bag and send them down the garbage chute. Also think seriously of searching for and setting up Christmass-ey lights somewhere in the general vinicity. Blast a cheesy 90's inspired "Fitness Routine Dance Mix" CD. Commence dancing around the apartment.

Stop blogging about everything you have to do and start doing it.

PS: Happy Birthday Daddykins! I hope you're enjoying Arizona as much as I'm not enjoying being in the frozen part of the world. Can you tell your cleaning habits have started to rub off on me? (Cue the "FINALLY" coming from your mouth right about now, eh?) Here's to 62-4 more years of being my one-and-only Dad.... "GO 'WAY LY-ION!" (If I get everything done today, you just might be treated to the story behind that saying ;-)

Preliminary Plans

Is it bad that I'm already looking forward to my birthday weekend, even though its 6 weeks away? But I am. Super excited. Because this is the big 21, folks. And my birthday falls on a Friday, which lends itself perfectly to devote a weekend to general debauchery and random shenanigans. Plus - and I think this is what's gotten me so excited - I get to spend it with the three people who matter the most to me.

Yep, that's right. I (finally!) convinced the Pegster to come join me in the big bad city. For an entire two days. Oh my. And K.02 is all mine for the entire weekend. And Skittles? Well, it wouldn't quite feel complete without him, so of course he's going to be there.

Friday is going to be my drinking night, as it's the night of my actual birthday. Skittles and I have a date with a hot bartender at one of the dance clubs downtown, oh yes. (And there's a free shot with my name on it, let me tell you!) Following which I will have to find my way to K.02's place (he can't join us in the drinking-fest as it's playoff time for the hockey league he plays in, booo) for the night (which, incidentally, will be the first night we spend together. ooooooh).

Saturday K.02 and I go pick the Pegster up from wherever she's decided to be dropped off and then I'm taking her on a touristy tour of downtown, followed by a sampling of the local cuisine (shawarma's and beavertails, and maybe? a properly made poutine) and she's going to skate the Canal while I walk it. Then it's time for dinner out; joining us will be Skittles because I have to let my two best friends in the world meet each other. It just wouldn't be right otherwise. Then its back to my place to just chillax and maybe play a rousing game of Monopoly and/or Risk.

Sunday I'm making a homestyle brunch (I would go out to Cora's but man alive! is that place expensive; and we're all a bunch of poor college students) and I want to catch a movie - specifically, this one:

Hopefully it's still playing by the time my birthday rolls around? And then it's time to say goodbye to the Pegster (sniff sniff) and then K.02 and I are probably just going to chillax at home for the rest of the day & night.

Now, doesn't that sound like a barrel of monkeys fun?! I think it does. I simply cannot wait.

only 44 days left! Let the countdown begin!

PS: Grades come out tomorrow. I'm scared.

Tuesday, December 18, 2007

Love.

and I have a blacklight.
which must be installed.
post haste.
oh, yes.

Monday, December 17, 2007

Cleaning....

For me to use as a reference point - all this has to be done today.
- Feed both pets
- Do the dishes (2 loads)
- Move Elvis' litter from bedroom to living room
- Scoop Elvis' litter 10:30
- Pick up after Molly (still having accidents, sigh) 11:00
- Put away rest of school stuff and odds & ends 10:30
- Sweep living/dining/kitchen - 10:30
- Swiffer Wetjet ibid (my back is going to kill me)
- Clean off coffee table
- Put away laundry 11:00
- Clean bedroom, including floor (sweep and swiffer)and organize closet 11:15
- Sweep/swiffer bathroom & foyer area.
- Tidy up the bathroom
- Scrub bathtub
- Take out garbage 11:30
- Put all Elvis' & Molly's little stuffies in a corner in the living room
- Put up artwork? (it's a little risqué)
!!!!Make sure everywhere in the house smells good/fresh - open the windows in bedrooms, light scented candle in living room, spray Febreze in bathroom!!!!

Btw: Is -23 too cold to take your puppy for a walk?

For the record, YES, -23 is way too cold to take your puppy on a walk - she made it about halfway there and then I had to pick her up and carry her the rest of the way and then all the way back.

9:30 am thoughts

If you wanna be my lover, you gotta get with my friends,
Make it last forever friendship never ends,
If you wanna be my lover, you have got to give,
Taking is too easy, but that's the way it is.
What do you think about that now you know how I feel,
Say you can handle my love are you for real,
I won't be hasty, I'll give you a try
If you really bug me then I'll say goodbye.

Sometimes blasting nostaglic 90's bubblegum pop tunes just feels good.
Well, I better get back to cleaning this place from top to bottom - one good(bad?) thing about having viewings is that this place has to be super, super clean.
*scurries off*
Byes!
Ps: Oh! HAPPY 20th BIRTHDAY PEGSTER!!!!!!!!!! you've finally caught up to me, haha. Luv you girl!

Sunday, December 16, 2007

More pictures

K.02 came over today and was told to take pictures by his mom. He posted them on Facebook in an album titled "My new step-daughter." I just had to laugh. But if Molly's his step-daughter...what does that make me? :\

Molly in her usual position......curled up between/on my feet (whether I'm standing or sitting)

Molly and her proud new step-daddy. lol.

Saturday, December 15, 2007

Ay Crumba

Ugh.

I started a cold sore last night, which means there's absolutely no hanky-panky for me (kissing and all) until it's cleared up. Major boo.

Motor in my inflatable mattress is dead, which means its official - I'm sleeping on the floor for the 3rd time in 5 months. Grrreat. My back is sure going to love me when I'm fifty.

I randomly bruised the bottom of my left foot yesterday, which is making it kind of painful to walk on.

Realized that Molly had an accident on my duvet cover. twice. Well, it was time to do the laundry anyways.

Go to do the laundry. Realize I'm 30 cents short for the dryer, and the minimum to load your card is 10$. Which I'm missing, oh, about $8.50.

So right now my clothes are hang-drying in the bathroom and on the bar-area of the kitchen. But I, smart girl that I am, washed my towels. Which are now soaking wet. Which means I can't take a shower.....

Ay yi yi. It's only 10:30 and this day is turning out to be a bad one.

One happy note though:
I woke up to Elvis next to me with one paw on my arm......and Molly on the small of my back. Awwww.

edit: Amazing what the kindness of a friend & the simple lending of 20$ does for a person. My roommate is transferring 20$ into my account - that covers the laundry, some food, and toliet paper (which I'm totally out of!). And the person who gave me Molly is stopping by later to give me some deworming stuff for her, free. And K.02 agreed to come over for 2 to give me a leash for her as well as a few other random things. So maybe today won't be so bad after all......

Friday, December 14, 2007

Molly & Elvis - A matching set!

Introducing my fur-babies:


Finally I have a picture! So this is Molly everyone - is she just adorably cute or what!? My roommate took this photo while I wasn't here and she said that Molly already knows her name - YEEESS! I must be doing something right!

And this is my 5 month old cat, Elvis (looking slightly demonic). Not so little anymore is he guys? Roommie said that she had to give him a treat to get him to sit - ha! I knew there was a reason I taught him to sit before he gets a treat!

La. La. La.

You're Anne of Green Gables!
by L.M. Montgomery

Bright, chipper, vivid, but with the emotional fortitude of cottage
cheese, you make quite an impression on everyone you meet. You're impulsive, rash,
honest, and probably don't have a great relationship with your parents. People hurt
your feelings constantly, but your brazen honesty doesn't exactly treat others with
kid gloves. Ultimately, though, you win the hearts and minds of everyone that matters.
You spell your name with an E and you want everyone to know about it.

Take the Book Quiz
at the Blue Pyramid.

I just aced my Intellectual Property exam. It feels good! Now I just have to get through Civil Procedures I and then I can go home for the day and worry about finding a roommate in time. I feel like asking everyone I see if they need a place to live. Stress and lack of nutrition (day...3?4? of absolutely nothing to eat) does strange things to a person....

Hunger is relative.

Thursday, December 13, 2007

Budget

I know this'll totally bore you but this is the safest place for a scatterbrain like me to put her budgeting. Sorry!!

Total Funds: 3446$
- 2575$ - Pay Roommate
+ 500$ – Last months from new tenant
_______________________
TOTAL : $1371

Expenses:

Rogers bill: 40$ x 3 = 120$
March Rent = 215$

April Rent = 480$
Truck = 50$
Computer fixing = 125$
Textbooks = 170$ from Roommate for 3 courses, 91.04$ for ENG. = 261.04$

K.02's textbook = 67.40$
________________________
TOTAL : $ 52.56

Other Debts:

Pegs = 200$ (50$ a month x 4)
Sarah = 32$

Still Need:
Coffee Table

Microwave

Other Income:
Textbook Buyback – 100$ approx.
GST – 59$ approx.

CPP - 204.68$ per month.

never a dull day...

Whew. I just purchased nearly all of our existing furniture plus half of 2.5 months rent plus the deposit money from my roommate.

Total cost? 2575$.

Ouch. Biggest thing in there was the deposit though, coming in at 1000$. Other than that, everything was more than reasonable.

Stuff I got:

2200$ - Rent
175 – TV
15 - Floor Lamp, Lamp in Room & Table
20 – Patio Furniture

20 - Router
50 - Dresser
25 - Computer Chair
25 – Side Tables
5 – Cleaning Supplies, Swiffer WetJet
15 – Cutlery holders & dish drying rack
15 – My Chair
5 – Curtains in Living Room

Stuff I still need:
Kitchen Table & Chairs (I'll just use the patio furniture....ha! how ghetto is that?)
Couches (2) (Skittles is giving me his old couch as long as I can get my own transport)
Lamp(s?)
Microwave
Coffee Table
Bed (Again, queensized mattress & boxspring FREE if I can get my own transport)

Textbooks.

Time to find a roommate guys...need one by January 1st. Must love animals, don't care if you smoke. 480$ per month plus half the Rogers (cable and internet) bill, which comes in at about 80$. No phone though, because I have a cell. Parking is available for an additional 30$. Male or Female, no couples please. Super close to Algonquin (10 minute walk), Baseline Transitway 15 minute walk, 118 right outside the door. College Square Shopping Centre right down the street (which includes beer/liquor store, Loblaw's, post office, etc). Secured entryway.

Think I can find one?

Clock's tickin....

Wednesday, December 12, 2007

1. 2. 3. 4. 5

Because I'm bored...

What Was I Doing 10 Years Ago?
I was in fifth grade, getting ready for Christmas in Nanaimo, B.C.. I earned my Christmas present money by chopping wood for our woodstove and also my parents gave me some money for volunteering for 3 days at the Salvation Army putting together food hampers for them to give out. It was alot of fun and at the end of it they let me put together my own hamper from the leftovers (which my mom promptly made me give back).

What Was I Doing 5 Years Ago?
I was fifteen? Yeah. So....Every weekend I was marching (I played trumpet) in all the Christmas parades for any town within a five hour drive that booked us. I hated it, mostly because I didn't make any friends (small town girls can sure be stuck-up and snobbish! wow) and being stuck with a bussful of girls aged 12-17 when you're not friends with any of them is hard. Other than that, just doing school, church, swimming and fighting with my mother. You know, the usual stuff.

What Was I Doing 1 Year Ago?
I was frantically trying to figure out what I had to do for next semester because I realized I was going to fail all my courses. Other than that, nothing. I stayed in my dorm room over Christmas break instead of going home.

What Was I Doing Yesterday?
I went over to K.02's in the morning and then got home to a note on my door from the roommate saying that the police had come and taken Molly for being too loud (also that I had a month to move out). CUE FREAKOUT. Missed my exam (but has since been fixed). I got a couple of friends to call the Humane Society and check if she's there as well as ask about the story (it seems that only by-law officers, not police, can do something like that, as well as all they can do is stick a note on your door asking you to contact them about it. So my roommates story is a bunch of horseshit, basically. I don't know what exactly happened, and I kind of don't even really care, just as long as I can get Molly back. As for the roommate issue, I'm moving in 2 weeks, flat out). Once I had gotten it all sorted, I went home and watched House M.D. and A Shot At Love with Tila Tequila and missed Molly all night. (Good news: This morning my friend e-mailed me and told me that Molly IS in the Shelter and I'm going to go pick her up later today).

5 Snacks I Enjoy:
Sliced tomatoes sprinkled with salt. Haagen Dazs Extraas ice cream, any flavour. Croutons. Ketchup chips. um....can Sprite count as a snack?

5 Things I Would Do if I Had a Million Dollars:
Buy a house. Clear my student debts. Invest/save. Give some to Skittles. Take a vacation (where for once I don't have to watch my funds!).

5 Places I Would Run Away To:
London, England. Skittles' place. Major's Hill (but only in the summer).

5 T.V. Shows I Like:
Grey's Anatomy, ER, House M.D., Mad About You. Friends, of course.

5 Things I Hate Doing:
Dishes by hand. Waking up fivesixseven times a night to pump up my bed. Leaving Molly alone. Coming over to the school if I want to use the computer. Looking for a place to live.

5 Biggest Joys of the Moment:
When Molly comes running to me with her tail wagging and when Elvis snuggles on my upper chest. Skittles' friendship. K.02's love. And the understanding my prof demonstrated as to why I missed my exam yesterday (and subsequently, allowing me to re-sit the exam).

Monday, December 10, 2007

Another fur-baby....

So I got a puppy tonight.

Yep, you heard me correctly.

A. Puppy. A 6-week old, female, black-with-white-accents, border collie/German Shepard/wiener/lab/hound mix (okay, so she's basically a mutt). (And yes, I do realize that within a week I went from owning one pet, a gorgeous kitty - who isn't really too pleased with me at the moment - to owning two more - a baby rat and a puppy).

And, seeing as its 2:30am, one can safely assume that she has not stopped whining/whimpering/crying since I started trying to put her to bed almost 2 hours ago. Of course, these whimpering jags have been interspersed with long periods of snoozetime....but only if I'm sitting in my regular chair in the living room (whilst being on the computer). Heaven forbid I actually get to crawl into my leaky inflatable mattress for more than five minutes. I don't want her to get the idea she's allowed in my bed (that privilege I'm reserving for Elvis, my cat), as well as she can't even really jump that high to begin with. I just spent the last half hour or so leading her over and over again back to the blanket-bed I made for her on the floor of my room and getting her settled in. Hasn't worked, obviously, as I'm now sitting here, hunched over, back aching, blogging about it while she naps away peacefully at my feet.

However, after five or six little 'accidents', she's finally learned that we go on the paper. Oh, the joy I felt when she achieved that milestone!!! I literally jumped up and down and then gave her HEAPS and HEAPS of praise for being such a good girl.


I think I just got smart - I just picked her up from where she was sleeping and carried her to her blanket-bed...will it work? Will she finally sleep where she's supposed to? So far I haven't heard or seen anything yet, so I'm crossing my fingers that it will....and I think that's my cue to see if I can sneak off and go to bed myself, finally. Hallelujah!

Her name, by the way, is
Molly Marilyn.

(She'll be called Molly for short. I'll see if I can get a picture uploaded tomorrow.)

Friday, December 7, 2007

Hee.

Ah, the joys of Facebook

It's the only place in the world you can play Scrabble against your grade 6 teacher (whom you haven't seen since 1999).

Thursday, December 6, 2007

Right out of left field....

Who says my life is boring?

oh yeah. me.

but today is shaping up to be anything but boring....

a friend of mine (who has been trying to 'get with me' for years...you'd think he'd get the hint by now I'm not interested? geesh) has just informed he bought me a present. Of the live, caged variety.

Um. What?!!!!

I have yet to discern if this is a joke or not.

Oh. Gosh. It's not a joke. He just showed me what it is - an Australian rat (I think?).

Apparently he got it for me because he wanted to - he's "liked me for so long, I thought maybe this would be a start to a good friendship then take it from there".

Gulp. Oh jeez......


Now, please excuse me while I rush around madly trying to clean up and make space for this new addition to my life. I don't know whether to be angry that he got something as huge as a living, breathing animal for a present without even consulting me first, or flattered. I think I'm both right now. Leaning more towards angry though.

Jolt

My msn name right now is "who wants to be alone in this world? you look around and all you see is hurt."

A contact I have on my list (we barely talk anymore) just IMed me with this statement:

"If you look around this world and all you see is hurt, than maybe you need to look again honey. Cause, I see the good too, the greatest friends someone could ask for, the life people would kill for, the joys that surround me. I see alot of things to be thankful for. (K)"

What a thoughtful reminder. Especially on this 18th anniversary of the "Montreal Massacre."

Saturday, December 1, 2007

Interesting.....

So K.02 came over today. It was probably our best time together yet....although I stupidly stayed up all night last night and finally lay down at 7 to rest a bit (supposed to pick him up from the bus stop around 730ish). I woke up an hour later to him rubbing my back....oops? I'm just thankful he got into the building okay and I forgot to lock my door last night. Besides, I do love being woken up personally rather than, say, from an alarm clock or someone knocking at my door. It's pure bliss. (however, having said that, I just realized how easy it is for some random crazy to come into my apartment and rape/murder me or whatever. That's kinda creepy.....)

So basically I've gotten maybe an hours sleep in the past 24 or so. Kind of exhausted and out of it. Have to stay up though until bedtime tonight so I don't get my schedule all out of wack.

Anyway, getting to the point: K.02 told me I've lost alot of weight since he'd seen me last, which was 2 and a half weeks ago. Mostly in my sides and face, I think is what he said. Hadn't even noticed I had, but I took a good long look in the mirror today and I think he's right.

Depression (almost never being hungry) and abject poverty (not being able to buy food even if I am hungry) certainly can do wonders for your body. Yep. It's great.

Sunday, November 25, 2007

6 things

Here's 6 little not-so-well known (I think?) quirks about myself: Enjoy!

1) I have a thing with owning black and white (specifically, tuxedo) cats.
All four cats that I have had the pleasure of owning at different points in my life have had tuxedo markings, and I don't think I will own a cat with a different marking pattern. When I was searching for Elvis, I specifically looked for black-and-white kittens. I don't know why - I just find B&W cats to be the most aesthetically pleasing, personally.

2) I describe myself as 'chronically single' and deep down believe I will stay that way for the majority of my life.
I'm 20 (nearly 21) years old and have not had a relationship last me past 7 months. Granted, I've had alot of stuff happen to me so far that isn't really conductive to keeping a relationship going longterm, but if I'm being quite honest, I'm beginning to think there's something, if not wrong, at least a little off, about this lack of ability.

3) I did 3 years as a Girl Guide & 1 year as a Pathfinder.
Yep, I was a good ol' Girl Guide! Wasn't really into the badges aspect, but I REALLY adored the camping and hiking parts of it (and I arguably lived in the best part of the country for those things:P). Except for when we went Winter Camping and we had to set up our canvas tents (with no floors!) in the pouring rain, or the time I woke up to find a really big and nasty looking bug inches from my face! EW! Oh, and I detested selling the cookies - I would just give my box of cookies to my Dad and he would take them to work and sell them for me. Thanks Daddy!

4) I often get new music to listen to from TV commercials.
It takes a little work to find the right song, but if I really like it, I search for it on goo*gle and then download it. Two memorable songs have been the iPod commercial where they're salsa dancing (song is "Mi Swing Es Tropical" by Nickodemus & Quantic featuring Tempo) and the Chevrolet Equinox commercial (song is "The Way I Am" by Ingrid Michaelson). Telus also has some pretty cute and catchy tunes to their advertisements. I also cannot spell the word commercial to save my life - thank goodness for spellcheck!

4.5) I also secretly love songs from Disney movies (shhh!)
Mulan, Pocahontas, Beauty & The Beast, Little Mermaid, Hercules, (and the list goes on)....all great movies, amazing soundtracks. Don't know why I like them so much, they're cheesy and meant for 8 year olds. Which, on second thought, is probably the reasons why. ;-)

5) If I don't know something, I either goo*gle or wiki it right away.
This is a really annoying habit I've developed over the last year. When I'm discussing something with Skittles and I don't know if a particular point is correct, or am wondering about something and don't know the answer, I immediately jump on the computer to research it, even if it isn't really important. It just bothers me until I know for sure what the answer is.I can do this upwards of five times a night. I'm anal that way.

6) I hated studying History in school but now that I'm older I really enjoy learning about it.
Quite possibly my hatred of History as a school subject stemmed from the fact that we were taught it in French by a teacher who - no word of a lie - looked like the missing link. And we were only taught Canadian history, which is all fine and dandy, but I find other parts of the world's (such as Europe) history to be MUCH more fascinating. I hope this interest will keep developing as I grow older!

Hope you enjoyed that :) It's now 3:30am and I'm getting a bit sleepy, as well as I'm scared of how hot this laptop is getting (the main fan is broken, so it's only running on the backup ones) so I better turn it off and get to bed.

Byes!

Friday, November 23, 2007

Pride


I love this city.

Did someone call a taxi?

Today was weird.

Less said the better about it, I think.

Although one antedote I'd thought I'd share with you all;

Skittles and I called for a cab and then were waiting outside (it was disgusting outside - cold and windy and snowing all day) for it; a cab pulled up after 10-15 minutes and it wasn't the one we ordered, but he said that he could take us anyway. So we get into the cab, and he asks us to do a favour - basically call dispatch and order another cab for the original address that he was assigned to. Which I thought was an incredibly nice thing to do - cab drivers around here are usually really rude, pushy and cutthroat, always looking for the better fare or not really caring who they screw over. They fight alot amongst themselves, even if they work for the same company. And they're 95% immigrants, so their English isn't great. But anyway, back to my story.

So he asks us to do that for him - and of course we say yes, so Skittles calls dispatch and asks for a cab to such and such address. Then the dispatch asked for the phone number from which we were calling from - and Skittles just said "It's a payphone" (which is what the cab driver said to say). Guess what the dispatcher said back?

"How can you be calling from a payphone inside your house?"- and Skittles politely stated that "No, I'm calling from a payphone and I want to be picked up at this address, which is inside."

She. Hung. Up. On. Him.

WTF?? Um, hello, rude much? Not to mention it's absolutely NONE of her business where the hell he's calling from or anything! AND it's totally unprofessional as well, don't you think? That little incident just blew my mind today. That someone could be that....just so unprofessional and really just plain rude while dealing with a customer about something so trivial!!

Normally I don't bitch about people in the service industry (okay, so it's a bit of a stretch to include taxi dispatchers, but for the purpose of this entry, I'm including her) but WOW. I'm still shaking my head over it hours later. I actually considered switching cab companies for awhile afterwards (I'm very brand-loyal, for most things; I use this company exclusively for my cabbing around, but this really gave me pause!).

Am I justified in feeling this way? What do you guys think about it?

Wednesday, November 21, 2007

Christmas Wish List

this song always makes me want to dance around. I'm lovin her new stuff:



I want to see this movie in theatres:

I, too, believe in music like some people belong in fairytales. And Jonathan Rhys-Meyers is FREAKING hawt. *drool*


This one looks super super cute. SO want to see this!


Not too sure that I want to see this anymore, based on this review. But I'm think yes, just because it's beowulf.

I want this coat for Christmas.

Or this one.
This is what is required to fix my computer. I also want it for Christmas.

And another thing I want but am too lazy to go searching for all four of them, is my posters!! They shipped on the 6th of November, they should be here already! Grr!

EDIT: Just after finishing this post, I went downstairs to check the mail. Guess what was waiting for me in the slot?? MY POSTERS!! FINALLY!!

Today - Updated

I'm sitting in bed with the laptop in front of me. My kitty is on his own special pillow (okay, so he's a bit spoiled, sue me) next to me, just like he is every night. Some nights we snuggle right close to each other; sometimes he gets fed up with my shifting around and goes to lay on the pillow (and some mornings he even settles in to groom my face something fierce - the trick is not to open your eyes, I swear). It's really sweet. And, in case you're wondering, which I'm sure you aren't, but I'm going to tell you anyway - the pillow in question is a pink fuzzy-covered Dora pillow. Why a nearly 21 year old has a pink fuzzy Dora pillow is something we're not going to get into - besides, I'm more of a SpongeBob Squarepants kind of girl in any case ;) Kitty is also getting to the point where I can point to it and say "PILL-ow" in a semi-stern voice and he obediently settles down onto it, as long as I'm on the bed next to it. Also très cute.

Because my bed is right underneath an (open) window, my whole right arm is pretty close to being frozen solid. It's -2 (that's Celsius people) right now....freaking cold to be sleeping underneath an open window in a tank top, but hey, I'm tough. And my duvet, once I snuggle properly underneath it, more than makes up for the fact that its below freezing outside. Also, the breeze feels good against my face, especially when I'm facing away from it ;-)

In a second I'm gonna hafta crawl out of bed to turn down my radio, which is currently playing the local country music station...it's pretty much the only commercial radio station we have that I can stand to listen to without wanting to claw my ears out 90% of the time. I just wish it would sense when I need it to be turned down automatically without me having to to get out of bed and do it manually, because I'm just super-lazy like that. I hope they play that song I've had in my head all day but don't know the name of, and also "How Bout Them Cowgirls?" by George Strait - my two favourite songs at the moment (despite the absolutely horrendous use of grammar in the title).

I realize I'm rambling, but surely you all realize that the health of my right arm is at stake here? If I stop typing, I'm sure it's going to seize up completely and be able to snap right off at the rotator cuff. And since I have
this blog and this one to catch up on, I type a bit, then tab over and read a bit. Type, tab, read. Excuse me a moment....

I told you that my sleeping into 2pm would come back to bite me in the ass, didn't I? Hencewhy I'm typing this entry at 2am while lying in bed. Okay, the time has come to finally get out of bed and cross the room to turn down my music to sleeping level. Mostly because I just want to listen to this:


Over and over again. It's not the actual video for the song, but that's not really important for the purpose of this exercise. To me it's such an incredibly romantic song. I don't know why - it just speaks to me.

Side note: it is currently freezing raining outside...and I really need to stop before my arm falls off, typing or not.


Oh, one last thing - as of tonight, I think I've made the choice to be single for now. Of course, due the past history and my fickle nature, this could change within a day or so....I'm really confused right now about a bunch of things, and while its not want I want to do, its something that's the right thing to do. Pffft. Sometimes I hate being a grown-up.

PS: of course it has to turn out that the moment I post this entry, the song I've been waiting to hear the entire time I've been writing it comes on the radio. Whats a girl to do but get out of bed again and crank the radio? And then scramble to access the radio's website "listen live" feature to find out the name of the song - which *drum roll please....* "Fell Right Into You" by Jessie Farrell. Necessary youtube video posting right here:
And you know how I said it was freezing raining? Forget the raining part, it's full-on snowing out there. It's just melting as it hits the ground. Whew! I'm not quite ready (okay, lets face it, I'm never ready) for full-on full-blown snow at this moment.


PPS: Crap. I just looked again and the snow is actually sticking now. *cue long wail of utter despair* Nooooooooooooooooooooo!!!!!!!!!

Tuesday, November 20, 2007

General Mish-Mash

I have an assessment meeting next Thursday for the housing I'm trying to get into. Yay!

in other news, I'm going slightly mad. Roommie is staying at her moms place for right now, meaning I have the entire apartment to myself....with no forms of communication whatsoever. Last night I found myself eating entirely too much & talking out loud to myself. Can we say, bored (and a little lonely)?!! I also watch incredible amounts of TV....Everyday I watch 2 hours of Friends (from 5:00-5:30 then again from 6:00-7:30) a half hour of Will & Grace (from 5:30-6:00) and then Jeopardy! plus the following:

Monday - 9pm: Heroes, 10pm: Project Runway Canada
Tuesday - 8pm: Pushing Daisies, 9pm: House, 10pm: A Shot At Love With Tila Tequila
Wednesday - 8pm: America's Next Top Model, 9pm: Criminal Minds, 10pm: CSI: NY
Thursday - 8pm: Ugly Betty, 9pm: Grey's Anatomy, 10pm: ER
Friday - The usual Friends & Jeopardy marathon & then it gets turned off.
Saturday - I try to keep it off the entire day, but usually get sucked into watching random stuff.
Sunday - 7pm: Cold Case, 8pm: The Amazing Race, 9pm: Desperate Housewives

See? Entirely too much boob tube! But what else is one to do when she's read all her books on her shelf a zillion and thirteen times and doesn't have a computer?

Today was the first day I woke up past 10am in about a month - granted, I only woke up a half hour later, but my god! what a difference a half hour of extra sleep makes! Of course, then I had to go ruin it and go back to bed until 2pm, so I'm thinking it'll be time to dip into the dwindling supply of sleeping agents I have in my possession tonight. Although this was the longest stretch in about 2 years of me managing my insomnia successfully without drugs, so I'm very pleased about that - now if I could only do that again, I'll take the ever-growing feeling of sleep deprivation gladly! :P

Weekend was good, in case you're wondering, although a little squished - 24 people are so not meant to be dining in my uncle's dining room! It's still very much fall in Toronto - whereas here it was snowing (thankfully, not sticking!) when I left on Friday. There was a magician (really, one of my uncle's first-year med students from the ER) for the younger kids, and he was actually pretty decent! The young ones (lets see....I think there were about 6 kids under the age of 6) were really amazed at him - one of them told their mom afterwards: "I'm a magician now Mom! I'm a magician now!" Too cute!
One of my cousin's children, who's about 2, came up to me while I was talking to my Mom and held out his sweater to me and when I asked him if he wanted to put it on, replied with an affirmative "yus!" and I - well, put his sweater on? Except I've never dressed a kid before, lol. I put it over his head and then asked my mom "how the heck do you dress a little kid?!" Turns out toddlers arms are incredibly bendy! :S lol. Made me feel slightly clucky, but that's probably cuz he's such an adorable little guy - the whole ruddy big chubby cheeks, blonde curls and blue eyes bit. awwww. *heart melts*

Anyway, my roommate has just informed me that there is a laptop for my convenience waiting for me at the apartment (right now I'm in the school's computer lab) and my tush is incredibly numb, so I think I shall head to the comfort of my home!

Byes!

Wednesday, November 14, 2007

Things are a'changin .... again ....

Today I received some news from my roommate which was fairly significant and kind of threw me for a loop - she got a job in another city come March, so that's when she's moving out.

I can't afford the rent on this place by myself, and I'm really not up to the challenge of finding another roommate; so I guess that means I'm moving. Again.

Woop.ee. (Excuse my enthusiam).

I'm going to try to see if I can get into what Skittles (my bff) is living in right now. Fingers crossed for me, please?
The enormity of this is just sinking in right now - its the first time I've ever actually lived truly alone, first time responsible for bills, first time for owning any furniture outside of things that belongs in the bedroom. Not to mention just the plain old yuckiness of moving. again.

Going up to T.O. this weekend to celebrate what would have been my Grandma's 90th birthday. This is the first birthday she's not here to celebrate it with us; it's going to be very bittersweet but nice - 26 people are coming and I can't wait to see everybody. I made the snap decision to go yesterday and now I'm really looking forward to it. It'll be a nice mini-break! :)

Sunday, November 11, 2007

Never Forget....


In Flanders Fields

In Flanders fields the poppies blow
Between the crosses, row on row
That mark our place; and in the sky
The larks, still bravely singing, fly
Scarce heard amid the guns below.

We are the Dead. Short days ago
We lived, felt dawn, saw sunset glow,
Loved and were loved, and now we lie
In Flanders fields.

Take up our quarrel with the foe:
To you from failing hands we throw
The torch; be yours to hold it high.
If ye break faith with us who die
We shall not sleep, though poppies grow
In Flanders fields.
- John McCrae (1915)

Tuesday, November 6, 2007

Rant

I'm absolutely sick of stressing out over money that I need and don't have.

Computer = broken, and it looks like its gonna stay that way.

Food = the cupboards are bare.

Christmas presents = Nada.

Outlook = bleak.

Stress Level = high.

*sigh*....

Thursday, November 1, 2007

Welcome to Sickville

I'm sick. Uber, full-fledged, yucky hurting sick.

Plugged nose (I'm at the point where I would chop it off if it mean I could sleep!!), chesty hacking cough, earache and sore throat.

I feel like I've been run over by a truck, literally. Ugh!

So tired - its really hard to sleep if you can't breathe; I found that out last night. Tried for ages, finally dozed off only to wake up at the ungodly hour of 630am....five hours of sleep when you feel like I do isn't enough, not even close. :(

I'm going to go make myself a cup of sugary hot tea, wrap myself in my duvet and watch mindless TV all day. Hopefully I can take a nap later?


PS: remind me to tell you about my roommate when I can actually think past how I feel.

Wednesday, October 31, 2007

*insert beaming smile here*

I passed I passed I passed
I passed I passed
I FUCKING* PASSED!!!!!!

Oh man, SO relieved!! You have absolutely no clue. I can't afford to fail anything this semester. I PASSED! *happy dances around in a circle*

This almost but not quite (and by that I mean, not really) makes up for the fact that my computer is yet AGAIN on the fritz. grrrr!


*pardon my French, si vous plait.

Monday, October 29, 2007

GRRRRR

I hate hate hate hate hate HATE midterms.

Especially Accounting ones. Especially when I've studied and studied and then I sit in front of the paper and MY MIND GOES TOTALLY BLANK! Especially when it's a make-up one and you really have no chances after this to pass the course. Hopefully I come close enough and he takes pity on me and passes me - I know I can pass this course with what we have left to do; it's just this goddamn midterm! (and the way the course is set up, if I can be totally honest).

Anyway, the stench from Elvis' litter box is overwhelming and I (finally!) have new litter to change it with. So that's what I need to do before my roommie gets home...

oooh, good tidbit about today: Methinks my mantoy was successful in arranging time away so we can spend a weekend together in a couple of weeks. First time spending any length of prolonged time together....I get the full details tonight when I'm back home & he's back from the gym. *excited girly squeal* LOL.

Saturday, October 27, 2007

procrastinating....

As I stood outside on the balcony having a smoke this morning, I had an overwhelming urge to go over to Home Depot (incidentally, right across the street), purchase a pumpkin, and carve it. Even though I haven't carved a pumpkin since Grade 7, when I found out that the pumpkin guts give me a horrible itchy rash where ever it touches my skin, and even though I don't have the tools necessary to actually complete the task. I didn't give in to the urge though, thankfully, so my life is pumpkin-less for another year. However, that's fine by me!

Had the very bright idea to rearrange the furniture in my room today, with the help of my bff; it actually works out better and gives the illusion of more space - and, as an extra bonus, it's actually easier to know where to place any artwork/posters I might will buy. I wound up getting a cheaper bed - aka yet another blow up mattress - yesterday, so with the leftover money I purchased the games of Risk (for my friend, his favourite 'classical' board game) and Monopoly (which so happens to be my personal favourite) and this:

Isn't it just the COOLEST?

All the heads move independently and can be arranged into different positions. I love it. It's so funky!

Anyway. Unfortunately, my room isn't getting any cleaner by me sitting here telling you about the new lamp I bought or how I rearranged it, so I gotta get back to it.

Gag.

Friday, October 26, 2007

my day, in all its boring glory!

Today has been fantastic! Although, why do all my fantastic days fall on a Friday? I really should work on making them fall on a Monday so it ensures I have a good week, school productivity-wise!

Got up this morning at 7:30am (which is big for me because I specifically arranged my timetable to start no earlier than 11:30, but most of my classes are in the afternoon, so I don't have to get up early, natch) and was out the door by 8:30. Went downtown and got my "Articles of Incorporation" (Phase I of my major Corporate Law assignment) stamped all official-like at City Hall. The only thing I was missing was the postal code in one area, but the clerk said "in real life, I would let them write it in with black ink" - so I did, he stamped, I left. Whole thing took five minutes.

I was back on campus by 10:30, so I went up to the 3rd floor B-Building labs and started working on Phase II of the same assignment. All it really entails is just submitting information from the file you're given into a legal software program called Fastco, and then it produces the documents you need with the relevant information. Finished inputting the information by 11:00; I'll produce the documents later - main thing is the information is all there in the software file (and, in real life, it means more billable hours! bwahaha!).

11:30 to 1:00 was Accounting. I failed the midterm something awful, but he gave us the detailed solutions to study - the make-up midterm is on Monday. All you get on the makeup is a pass or fail - if you fail a second time, you fail the entire course. Which isn't going to happen, people! Then, once that part of the course is done, you have to do 11 exercises off this Accounting software, with step-by-step instructions provided, by yourself and/or on your own time. So if you finish by next week, then you're completely finito. You don't have to come to class anymore....nice added incentive to finish quickly, eh? I finished Exercises 1-5 during class time; I didn't really feel like sticking around to finish all of them, even though I could have.

My Motion (for Civil Procedures) group meeting was postponed as 2 of my group members had to go get their "Articles of Incorporation" stamped - I'm on the Responding party anyways, so my stuff isn't due for a couple of weeks yet. We're meeting Monday to go over it, I think?
Went home after Accounting because Civil & Corporate were cancelled, and since I did all my work for Corporate beforehand there was really no point in sticking around anyways. So instead of being done at 5:30, I was done at 1:00 - SCORE! That made me happy!

Still to do today is clean my room (which is what I should be doing instead of boring you all with my school stuff), take back my bed and argue forcefully explain politely that I would like a full refund (not store credit or exchange). Hopefully I won't have to get too bitchy assertive. And hopefully they'll do it! If push comes to shove, though, I always have my sob story of how I'm actually sleeping on the floor and this refund is the only way I can afford a proper bed. Oh, I'm good.
;-)

I wish

1) I wish I didn't have to be up so early (yes, 8am is early).
2) I wish I didn't have to run downtown to do something for an assignment.
3) I wish I didn't leave this to the last minute.
4) I wish I didn't have to be back on campus for 11:30.
5) I wish I could go back to bed.
6) I wish I woke up looking perfect & gorgeous and ready to run out the door.
7) I wish I woke up feeling refreshed instead of still being tired.
6) I wish my cat wasn't being such a spaz right now.
8) I wish downtown wasn't so far away!
9) I hope everything goes smoothly and on time - I can't afford mistakes right now.
10) However, I am thankful that only my morning is busy - after I do this crazy running around dance, all I have to do is meet my Civil Pro group for the Motion assignment and work a little on my Phase II for Corporate, but actual classes are cancelled to let us work on it.

I should get going - no time to waste! *boogies out the door*


"I look into the window of my mind
Reflections of the fears I know I've left behind
I step out of the ordinary
I can feel my soul ascending
I am on my way
Can't stop me now
And you can do the same
What have you done today to make you feel proud?
It's never too late to try
What have you done today to make you feel proud?
You could be so many people
If you make that break for freedom
What have you done today to make you feel proud?"
-Proud, Heather Small

Wednesday, October 24, 2007

chip-chip-a-roo!

I had the weirdest dream last night. I dreamed that I was pregnant, but I could feel the outline of the baby's head & torso and limbs - just not the hands or feet, because they weren't 'formed' yet. And it wasn't the typical 'round belly' of being pregnant, rather it was really like I had a child forming under my skin. And my stomach hurt all throughout the dream and I kept rubbing it. Wonder if it means anything? Probably not....I hope not. That's one weird ass dream!

Computers back and fixed! So happy I have my baby back! =-) Still sleeping on the floor though, which totally sucks. I'm a bit crabbier than usual, but its easier to get out of bed (or rather, stay out of bed) in the morning. Operation Take-Back-Bed is scheduled for this weekend - its a two person job because I certainly can't carry that gigantic box all by myself. Hopefully they give me a full refund (even though I don't have the receipt anymore, I have the bank statement saying I bought the bed from Canadian Tire), because I need a bed and this is the only way I can afford one!

Nothing else is really happening here. Back to watching Friends I guess!

Wednesday, October 17, 2007

The future's gonna eat me.

Life is seriously full of suckage at the moment. Monday night my computer bit the dust completely, and last night my bed deflated (it was a blowup camping bed) as well. So now I'm back to sleeping on the floor indefinitely. I just don't have the money to get another bed right now; I don't even have the money to fix my computer but since a friend is doing the repairs, at least I won't get slammed for the cost of labour. If this keeps up, I'm going to need a hip replacement by the time I'm 30.

Oh yeah, and then I lost my bank card; not looking forward to going in and fighting with them over my ID to get a new card (they apparently don't take health cards as ID but it's the only thing I have!). It's just an extra added annoyance that I could really do without at the moment.

Haven't been sleeping well - well, of course not, I'm sleeping on blankets on the floor - but I'm also super stressed out and worried about everything that's happening in my life right now.. Slept maybe? 4 hours on Monday night, and 5 last night, which is definitely not enough.


I feel overwhelmed, scared and very, very much alone.